Sorrowful Pleasantries
by tck-aesthetic
Summary: Collection of 50 1-word prompts, focused on China and Skulduggery.
1\. Bullet

She clicked the bullet back into his gun after thoroughly examining it. "What a crude weapon," she remarked.

2\. Flight

Sometimes Skulduggery would take her flying, skimming near the clouds as she clutched him tightly. She never told him, but she wasn't paying so much attention to the view. He knew.

3\. Lesson

China gasped, out of breath from sprinting to her room. When Skulduggery had promised to teach her a lesson for hiding his hats, she'd thought he had been joking. But when he'd returned to find his hats missing once again, the evil glint in his eye and the slight opening of his jaw that she knew to be a grin had her running for her life.

4\. Revenge

The infuriatingly witty skeleton couldn't feel anything, and so China was unable to take her revenge, helpless as his bony fingers slid teasingly over her ribs and sent her into fits of giggles.

5\. Storm

If there was one thing in the world that China truly, irrefutably loved, it was wild, uncontrollable storms, the ones that raged their hatred with thunder and lightning, the ones that she would dance in when she thought nobody was watching. But he was watching.

6\. Wind

The breeze that stirred the hem of her skirt, she knew, was not of a natural origin, and she sent a withering glare in the detective's direction.

7\. Sleep

Skulduggery didn't sleep, but he was content to watch China, making sure that her chest rose and fell steadily, that her angelic peace remained undisturbed.

8\. Trace

Late at night, as they lay side by side, he would trace each and every tattoo with his cool, boned fingers, from the ones on her scalp to the ones on the soles of her feet, rippling shivers throughout her body whenever he passed over delicate patches of her skin.

9\. Shiver

China, despite her cool nature, hated the cold, craved warmth. Whenever winter came and she huddled shivering beneath a blanket, he would huddle with her, perhaps uselessly in his mind, as he could neither feel the cold or produce body heat to warm her up, but she relished the contact that had warmth blossoming from the inside out.

10\. Snow

China had never understood why children took such pleasure in frolicking in the snow. _She_ certainly never had. But when a ball of snow hit her square in the face, her face twisted into a wicked grin, and she shot after Skulduggery.

11\. Hair

There was something about China's hair that had Skulduggery mesmerized. The length, the color, black as a starless night, the way it looked so soft, it might feel like a cloud, or silk. Occasionally she would allow him to touch it, sending shivers down her elegant spine with each strand of hair he brushed his fingers across.

12\. Stare

Her sixth sense, honed over years, always told her when he was staring at her. Sometimes she called him on it, sometimes she didn't, but she always, always knew.

13\. Happiest

The happiest China had ever been was when she was riding one of her horses. Then she met Skulduggery.

14\. Immortality

He was truly immortal, she would live for thousands of years more. They were both content with that.

15\. Sauna

He couldn't understand why China loved the sauna so much. She claimed that the sweat made her body healthy, that the heat felt good, both of which were moot concepts to him, having skin and feeling temperature. He would still sit in it with her, pale bones gleaming, and watch her glorious, towel-wrapped form relax.

16\. Cavity

She rubbed just below her lip, frowned, and went to the mirror, opening her mouth and poking around. She turned to him. "Skulduggery?" "Hmm?" "I have a cavity." "…What?"

17\. Vacation

Neither of them saw much of a point in a vacation. After all, they had been everywhere, done everything. All their pleasures were at home.

18\. Revealing

China walked out of her closet, clad in a tight black dress. "What do you think?" "Err… Isn't it a bit," he coughed, "revealing?" She rolled her eyes and walked past him to the door. "That, my dear Skulduggery, is entirely the point."

19\. Mistake

China walked in to find Skulduggery looking uncharacteristically guilty. "China dear," he said, "I've made a mistake." She pushed past him to find a dead man on the floor, his blood staining her new, very expensive carpet. "Yes," she told him. "Yes, you have."

20\. Melodramatic

"Don't you think you're overreacting? It's just a bit of blood." China walked out of the room, came back in with a toothbrush, handed it to Skulduggery, and pointed at the rapidly drying stain on the floor. Skulduggery sighed.

21\. Surprise

"Boo!" Skulduggery shouted as he leapt out from behind the curtain. China stared at him, nonplussed, for a good minute before shaking her head sadly and walking out.

22\. Overindulge

Skulduggery returned to find China sitting on the floor, in sweatpants and a tank top, surrounded by bars of designer chocolate. Mildly disturbed, he took a seat on the floor in front of her and stared as she finished off one bar and started on another. "Not," she held up a finger, "one word." He shrugged. "Describe the taste to me?" She raised an eyebrow. "Chocolatey."

23\. Book

It didn't take much for him to wrest the book from her grasp. One poke to the side from a slim finger and she dropped it into his waiting hand. She sat on the couch and sulked, refusing to waste what was left of her dignity by chasing after him and begging for it back. He sat on the opposite end of the couch and continued reading where she had left off. She wouldn't give him the satisfaction of inching closer. She wouldn't.

24\. Morning

China always woke up looking perfect. Even so, she took an extraordinarily long time getting ready, so much so that Skulduggery moped around, bored. She mostly did it to annoy him, and because the sight of the skeleton in pajamas was so amusing to her that she often got distracted with suppressing her smile.

25\. Makeup

He watched her as she applied the makeup she didn't need, fascinated. "What does that do?" he asked, pointing to a container of blush. "It makes my cheeks pink," she muttered without looking down. "Well I can do that just fine." China bit her lip. A few seconds passed. "What does that do?" It was a tube of lipstick this time. "It makes my lips red." "I can do that too. What's the point of all this again?" She pointed to the door.

26\. Sensitive

China flopped face first onto her bed, wincing. That had been the longest day she'd had in a while. She closed her eyes, laid there for an indeterminate amount of time. The bed dipped, and Skulduggery seated himself next to her, rubbing his fingers over her back in a soothing fashion. She whimpered as he dug deeper, lashes fluttering, eyes rolling back. She knew there was a reason she kept him around.

27\. Color

Her favorite color, to Skulduggery's surprise, was yellow. Not black or blue as he had assumed, but bright, sunny yellow. Ever since this discovery, she would find the occasional knick-knack, always yellow, sitting on her beside table. It brought the hint of a smile to her face.

28\. Fruit

He tried strawberries. He tried raspberries, blueberries, apples, bananas, oranges, grapes. When at last he'd given it one last shot, he'd managed to hit the jackpot. Pomegranates had a tough outer shell, took forever to dig the seeds out, and when one was finally rewarded with a handful of seeds at the end, they were mixed flavor- sweet and tart. They reminded China of herself.

29\. Music

30\. China loved music. It didn't matter the kind, vocal, instrumental, both, she listened to it with a passion. Sometimes, when she had trouble sleeping, Skulduggery would sing for her, his tenor solo lulling her to sleep with ease.

31\. Shower

China hung up her robe, stepped into the shower- and immediately squealed and jumped back out again. "Pleasant!" she roared. "Get your bones in here!" He popped his head cautiously in the doorway. "Did you, or did you not," she asked before he could speak, "use all of my hot water?" She could see his vision straining to focus on her face, not to slide lower. "Well… If I turn it really hot, I can almost feel it." "Skulduggery, you are a skeleton. You do not need to shower."

32\. Distraction

He was working at her desk, looking over files for another case. She was doing yoga in a silk robe in front of the window. As he watched, she went into another pose, holding one leg above her head. The hem of the roe slid further and further down, exposing more of her leg as it went. "China, dear. You're really quite distracting." She smirked.

33\. River

Both of them refused to even dip a toe into the river they were having a picnic by, so they just sat and watched the water go by, like a stream of time, unbroken.

34\. Loser

China gaped as Skulduggery packed up the game. She gaped as he put it back on the shelf and she gaped as he left the room. How in the _hell_ had he beaten her at Monopoly?

35\. Tears

Neither of them had ever seen the other one cry. Laugh, sure, smile, mope, yawn, throw the occasional tantrum. But cry? No. That would never, ever happen.

36\. Library

China raced through the bookshelves of her beloved library, giggling softly. Moonlight spilled through the windows as she ran, her mental map guiding her. "Oh China," he called. "I'm coming for you!" She bit her lip, creeping alongside a bookcase. He wouldn't find her. He wouldn't- she shrieked and took off running. He had found her.

37\. Mischief

It was ready. Everything was set. Skulduggery opened the door to find a burning landscape of lava. He recoiled before darkening and slashing at the illusion, finding China standing gleefully behind it. Without warning, he leapt at her, catching her around the waist and bringing them both tumbling to the ground, him on top of her. He shocked a squeal out of her as they fell, and then her back was pressed into the carpet, Skulduggery pinning her down, a glint in his eye. "Now," he said. "What to do with you…" China gulped.

38\. Embrace

China's embrace was warm, soft, and deadly. Skulduggery's was cold, hard, and kind. They complemented each other.

39\. Flower

However clique it seemed, China adored roses. She was in love with the elegant stems, the pointed thorns, the radiant red of the petals. Skulduggery brought one for her every Wednesday.

40\. Silence

"China?" She looked at him. "Where did you put the glasses?" She opened her mouth to speak, then pointed at the cupboard. "What was that? I couldn't hear you." She pressed her lips into a thin line, the pointed harder. "Oh, that's right. You've lost your voice." She glared.

41\. Joke

"China dear?" "Hmm?" "What do you call a three-humped camel?" She raised an eyebrow. "Pregnant!" She blinked.

42\. Garden

They walked, side by side, through the garden that China had tended herself. Overarching branches shaded the pair, lush grass beneath their bare feet cushioning their steps. A bird came and sat on China's shoulder, then Skulduggery's head. He froze. "China. What is on my head?" She grinned. "Nothing."

43\. Fire

China leaned her head on Skulduggery's shoulder, sighing deeply. The fire before them crackled, and they both stared into it, mesmerized.

44\. Dream

China shifted, muttering in her sleep. She sighed, turned over, and settled in even closer to Skulduggery's prone form. He moved his arm to wrap around her waist, and she sighed again. Whatever dream she was having that night must have been a good one.

45\. Clean

China plugged the vacuum in and started running it over her carpet. Hearing the noise, Skulduggery made an appearance. "You own a vacuum?" She looked at him oddly. "How very mundane of you." She stepped back from the vacuum, gestured to the handle. "By all means, Skulduggery."

46\. Envelope

"China," he called. "You have mail!" The envelope he held between his fingers was, for all intents and purposes, an average letter. He handed it to her, and she picked up a delicate letter opener to slice the top. "Who's it from?" he asked excitedly. She raised an eyebrow. "The electricity company."

47\. Laughter

One of the main reasons she loved Skulduggery was because he made her laugh. Sometimes, it would be a joke, a terrible one, but a joke nonetheless. Other times, a gift, something he knew she would find amusing. An email with a picture of him in some exotic place during a case. Even when he pinned her down and ran his fingers over her sides until her face was flushed and her a giggling mess, Skulduggery always, always managed to make her laugh.

48\. Childhood

Sometimes, when she was bored, Skulduggery would tell her stories of his childhood, the simple life he'd led once upon a time. In return, she'd tell him of her brother Bliss, and their escapades as youths. While he would become happy talking of his early family, she would always become sad.

49\. Smile

She found his smile endearing, a slight parting of his jaw that indicated a grin, usually wickedly sarcastic. He found hers entrancing, a flash of white teeth and red lips in a pale face, surrounded by night-black hair and highlighted by ice-blue eyes. Neither did it very often.

50\. Pet

As soon as she returned, she could tell that there was a foreign presence in the room. On edge, she crept closer and closer, freezing when she heard a soft meow coming from around the corner. "Skulduggery Pleasant!" she yelled. "Why is there a cat in my library?"


End file.
